With writing coach Jurgen Wolff
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My guest this week is writer and writing coach Jurgen Wolff.
Jurgen Wolff writes in a variety of media. He’s written the feature film “The Real Howard Spitz” (starring Kelsey Grammer and Amanda Donohoe) and more than 100 hours of TV for series like "Benson," "Family Ties," "The Love Boat," and "Relic Hunter." He wrote two ABC TV movies for the Olsen Twins, the miniseries “Midnight Man” (starring Rob Lowe), and an original animated series, “Norman Normal.”
Jurgen has written fiction and nonfiction for many newspapers and magazines, including The San Francisco Chronicle, The Times Educational Supplement, The Los Angeles Times, Writer’s Digest, and The London Evening News. His books include, among others, Your Writing Coach, Do Something Different, and Successful Sitcom Writing. Jurgen’s plays have been produced in London, New York, Berlin, Los Angeles, and Copenhagen. He teaches creativity workshops around the world and is a certified hypnotherapist and neurolinguistic programming practitioner. He divides his time between London and Southern California.
WS: Welcome to the Writing Show, Jurgen. It’s a pleasure to have you with us.
Jurgen Wolff (JW): Thank you.
WS: Let’s talk about some of the psychological factors involved in writing. What is the most common problem you see in your work with writers?
JW: I think there are two that really top the list. The first is just a fear of getting started, and this is why a lot of people who want to write never get around to it. They talk about it, they think about it, but they don’t actually sit down and do the work. Part of that is just a fear of the blank page. If you’re going to write a book and you’ve got a ream of fresh paper sitting there that you’re about to feed into your printer, that’s a lot of white space to cover, and it is daunting. But of course, we don’t write 300 pages at a time: we write one page at a time and even beyond that, one sentence at a time. So one of the things I think people need to do is change the way they look at it and say, “My goal today isn’t to write 300 pages. My goal today is to write one or two or three pages.”
The other big one is the fear of rejection. Let’s say I go to all this trouble and pour my heart out and create a novel or a nonfiction book or a series of articles or whatever it is--maybe a screenplay--and at the end of all that, someone is going to have to want to buy it, do something with it, and what if that was all for nothing? Will I be embarrassed--even humiliated--because I’ve told people I’m writing this thing, and I’m wondering whether I wasted hours and hours and days and months of my time? So that’s the other big fear. And there’s a genuine risk there. I can’t say that it’s an illogical fear because sometimes these things don’t work out, but of course if you don’t try, they definitely won’t work out.
WS: So there must be an issue with telling people that you’re writing.
JW: It works both ways. Sometimes it’s a good thing to make that commitment public because that increases your likelihood of actually sitting down and doing it. If you tell people all about the thing you’re writing, then you probably will feel like you should actually do it. On the other hand, it increases the risk: if it doesn’t work out in one way or another, you might be embarrassed. But I think for a lot of people who write, the people around them are impressed just by the fact that they're doing it. Whatever else happens of course, it’s even better if it gets published as a book or made into a film, but I think we have to put those thoughts aside. Mostly you have to think about doing this because it’s something you're driven to do, something you are really motivated to do that is a dream of yours, and you can’t worry too much about what other people think.
WS: What happens if you have people around you who are not only not supportive but who are downright derogatory? I know this happens to a lot of people. Everything from, “You’ll never make a living that way” to “Why do you want to waste your time?” or “You’re no good.”
JW: Yes, that is a problem. And even more hurtful in a way because it’s easier to dismiss those derogatory people. But sometimes more hurtful are the people who are very patronizing. I find in talking to writers that women get this a lot more than men. The men in their lives say, “Oh yes, well, dear, your little hobby,” pat, pat on the head. It’s really infuriating to be treated that way. So I think the first thing is you have to train people to be aware of how much this means to you. A lot of times they’ll say, “Oh, I was just joking,” and then you have to say to them, “I guess you didn’t mean anything negative by it, but it sure affects me that way, so do me a favor. This is one thing I’d rather not joke about.” Just be very clear in making it explicit to people that this is damaging and hurtful to you.
But you also have to take into consideration how you're treating their dreams, assuming they have any dreams. You're only going to get respect if you give respect, so that’s just one little check we need to make ourselves. And the other thing is, we have to accept at the end of the day maybe the people in our lives won't support our dreams so much and we have to find some people who will. Nowadays it’s a lot easier to go on the Internet to find writing forums and groups, or even better of course if you can go out and find a local writing group or a class or anywhere where people congregate who understand what you want to do.
So it isn’t always ideal in terms of support from friends and family. But I think if you let them know how important it is to you, really communicate that very explicitly and also get some new friends who are into the same kinds of things, then you have a much better chance of feeling like there’s a level of support in your life.
WS: Let’s go back to these two items for a second because I have another question about them. One was being afraid of the blank page, and the other one was fear of rejection.
JW: Right.
WS: I’m wondering if these fears say something about the rest of writers’ personalities. Are we timid people? Are we shrinking violets? I know it’s hard to generalize, but I’m just wondering, do these fears say something else about writers?
Transcript continues....
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(c) Paula Hollywood, Inc. 2008